There is No Sp--Woah What's That?!
Chaz' brilliance continues to astound and bewilder.
Jon Quixote was There!
Sunday, December 21, 2008
Jon Quixote was There!
Thursday, December 04, 2008
Frostbite. No, wait! Hypothermia!
Elaur needed an opponent for Thereywood Squares and figured that I'd be a good choice. Little did she know that I'm a world-renowned expert tic-tac-toe player with more than fifty international championships beneath my belt!
It's true.
So, after a brief overview (or two) of the rules from Francis (or three), we were on to the first round. It was neck and neck for a moment, but then Elaur was faced with a most curious question. Given that she's from Cleveland, it seemed obvious that she would know what Washington D.C.'s lowest temperature on record was.
Round two shortly followed with questions just as gripping as the first, and certainly no shortage of trivia about Washington D.C.! Robert almost tricked me into agreeing with him about its record precipitation, but I just got this sketchy vibe from him. I couldn't quite place my finger on it though:
"Now, you should believe me because I know what I'm talking about. In fact, I've lived in Washington D.C. most of my life so you really should believe me. And I'm being perfectly honest when I say that I know everything there is to know about Washington D.C. and so I really think you should take me at my word when I say that..."
And so it seemed our game was coming rapidly to a close, but I just couldn't have that. Nono, I was dragged into this game kicking and screaming so I was going to see it through! I gave one of my victories to Elaur behind Francis' back and we promptly proceeded to sudden death overtime.
So there we were, two O's and no X's on the board. Victory was within my grasp. My question was "What is the cause of the most accidents in the winter?" Chagall's answer was ZMW's. I looked at Elaur, biting her nails; she knew it was over. I glanced at the board, gripping my seat with sweaty palms; this was it. I agreed with Chagall.
Somewhere in the hysteria that ensued, we wound up in a tie. There was some difference of opinion as to whether or not there_testers got frostbite running around Frosty in their skivvies, or maybe it was Onus who thought Francis was suffering from hypothermia--you know, I don't really recall what the confusion was all about to be honest. Either way, Elaur and I somehow both won the grand and runner up prizes. We celebrated our new wheels over a pizza.
It's true.
So, after a brief overview (or two) of the rules from Francis (or three), we were on to the first round. It was neck and neck for a moment, but then Elaur was faced with a most curious question. Given that she's from Cleveland, it seemed obvious that she would know what Washington D.C.'s lowest temperature on record was.
Round two shortly followed with questions just as gripping as the first, and certainly no shortage of trivia about Washington D.C.! Robert almost tricked me into agreeing with him about its record precipitation, but I just got this sketchy vibe from him. I couldn't quite place my finger on it though:
"Now, you should believe me because I know what I'm talking about. In fact, I've lived in Washington D.C. most of my life so you really should believe me. And I'm being perfectly honest when I say that I know everything there is to know about Washington D.C. and so I really think you should take me at my word when I say that..."
And so it seemed our game was coming rapidly to a close, but I just couldn't have that. Nono, I was dragged into this game kicking and screaming so I was going to see it through! I gave one of my victories to Elaur behind Francis' back and we promptly proceeded to sudden death overtime.
So there we were, two O's and no X's on the board. Victory was within my grasp. My question was "What is the cause of the most accidents in the winter?" Chagall's answer was ZMW's. I looked at Elaur, biting her nails; she knew it was over. I glanced at the board, gripping my seat with sweaty palms; this was it. I agreed with Chagall.
Well who knew ZMW's weren't real automobiles?!
Somewhere in the hysteria that ensued, we wound up in a tie. There was some difference of opinion as to whether or not there_testers got frostbite running around Frosty in their skivvies, or maybe it was Onus who thought Francis was suffering from hypothermia--you know, I don't really recall what the confusion was all about to be honest. Either way, Elaur and I somehow both won the grand and runner up prizes. We celebrated our new wheels over a pizza.
Jon Quixote was There!
Friday, November 21, 2008
Godzilla!
Before the open house of the new Welcome Walkway ends, I think a self-guided tour of the new docks is in order. Grab your cameras and fanny packs but, please, don't feed the wildlife.
When a newbie or, in this case, a hapless tourist lands at this isolated dock, they are greeted by a nifty little tutorial which is intended to guide the poor brainless sod through his or her paces, imparting various bits of wisdom along the way. I couldn't help but notice, however, the lack of any signage carrying the cautionary wisdom: "NO BEGGING!!". I've heard they're still refining the docks, though, so perhaps it will be included in a future revision.
They really pulled out all the stops for our precious newbies on the new dock. Even the captain of the nearby luxury cruise ship, the S.S. Skippy, is on call waiting to greet every new potential griefer!
Appropriately themed spas have also been conveniently located a mere stone's throw from where we landed. These spas were undoubtedly placed here to allow newbies to make the much-needed trimmings to their eyebrows, among various other bodily enhancements which, I'm sure, accurately reflect the physique of their operators out in the Real.
The spas also provide a nice comfy couch for our newbie friends to explore the curious magnetics which infallibly attract the lips of two avies-in-orange when they are seated in close proximity to one another. I sure wish they'd do something about that penetratingly loud noise though.
The dock is also home to a couple of stylized private boats which successfully kidnap Jules Verne and smoosh him beneath the bow of a yacht before inflating him with feelium and roasting him beneath the Delorean-style hoverjets freshly installed on a Southern riverboat. Gruesome, I know, but that's what happens when you feed the local wildlife when you were expressly cautioned not to do so.
The final treasure these docks have to offer is a lovely set of miniatures, adeptly sculpted to match a few of the various scenic landmarks our precious planet has to offer. And aren't they just the cutest little toys you've ever seen?
While it's still open to visitors, you can tour the Welcome Walkway here. Make with the clicking, but steer clear of the locals!
When a newbie or, in this case, a hapless tourist lands at this isolated dock, they are greeted by a nifty little tutorial which is intended to guide the poor brainless sod through his or her paces, imparting various bits of wisdom along the way. I couldn't help but notice, however, the lack of any signage carrying the cautionary wisdom: "NO BEGGING!!". I've heard they're still refining the docks, though, so perhaps it will be included in a future revision.
They really pulled out all the stops for our precious newbies on the new dock. Even the captain of the nearby luxury cruise ship, the S.S. Skippy, is on call waiting to greet every new potential griefer!
Appropriately themed spas have also been conveniently located a mere stone's throw from where we landed. These spas were undoubtedly placed here to allow newbies to make the much-needed trimmings to their eyebrows, among various other bodily enhancements which, I'm sure, accurately reflect the physique of their operators out in the Real.
The spas also provide a nice comfy couch for our newbie friends to explore the curious magnetics which infallibly attract the lips of two avies-in-orange when they are seated in close proximity to one another. I sure wish they'd do something about that penetratingly loud noise though.
The dock is also home to a couple of stylized private boats which successfully kidnap Jules Verne and smoosh him beneath the bow of a yacht before inflating him with feelium and roasting him beneath the Delorean-style hoverjets freshly installed on a Southern riverboat. Gruesome, I know, but that's what happens when you feed the local wildlife when you were expressly cautioned not to do so.
The final treasure these docks have to offer is a lovely set of miniatures, adeptly sculpted to match a few of the various scenic landmarks our precious planet has to offer. And aren't they just the cutest little toys you've ever seen?
While it's still open to visitors, you can tour the Welcome Walkway here. Make with the clicking, but steer clear of the locals!
Jon Quixote was There!
Tuesday, June 10, 2008
Don't Eat The Burrito
Chef tried warn him, but he just didn't want to listen. Headstrong and courageous, he had his own ideas about what makes a good wrap. As he sat there waiting for his food, I knew that hungry grin on his face could only mean one thing: Trouble.
As he inhaled the last of his super sized meal, a look of bright red horror overtook his face. That was not any ordinary burrito he just ate. No, that burrito had a little extra...something...courtesy of the chef.
Poor guy went soaring off into the sunset, right then and there. Yep, I bet he's somewhere on the other side of Theria by now. Hope he sends me a postcard...
As he inhaled the last of his super sized meal, a look of bright red horror overtook his face. That was not any ordinary burrito he just ate. No, that burrito had a little extra...something...courtesy of the chef.
Poor guy went soaring off into the sunset, right then and there. Yep, I bet he's somewhere on the other side of Theria by now. Hope he sends me a postcard...
Jon Quixote was There!
Friday, January 25, 2008
Rest in Peace, Mr. Blinky
We all know Mr. Blinky. He's the ghostly pale avatar with a DOID number for a name. He is the biggest mystery of our time, out there constantly blinking in and out of existence, forever casting those longing eyes of his out upon the farthest reaches of Therian soil. He's been a friend to each and every one of us since the very moment we were first introduced to this unique individual, standing in stark contrast to the brightly colored landscape around him. From Saja's shoreline out into the vast blue concrete, from one coast of New Kansas to the other, he's seen good times and bad times, he's been trapped and subsequently released, he's been held hostage and paid homage to, he's met all kinds of people and has seen to the farthest corners of Theria, he's had a girlfriend, he's been entrusted by many of us with countless untold secrets, and he's even been allowed to relieve himself on rare occasion.
This is our friend, Mr. Blinky, DOID number 108891507. But he wasn't always so. Once upon a time, he had a purpose. He was created for a specific reason and he was content to fulfill that purpose. He lived out his life in Saja, surrounded by a tranquil atmosphere and soundtrack. But one day, something went terribly wrong. A horrible accident took place in Saja which thundered through the sky and shook every pod in its soil. And thus Blinky was unwillingly created, transformed into the white man we know and love. His first moments in this new existence must have been horrifying as he tumbled downward from his once comfortable location atop a floating island, spiraling toward the unknown land below. He shortly found himself standing on the shore of a completely foreign island, dense fog threatening him on one side, an ocean of blue concrete beckoning him on the other, and an ominous moon hanging above his head.
It wasn't long before others took notice of this newcomer, this strange gh0st in the machine. He received quite a bit of attention for one lone avatar. People wondered why he looked so sad and why he gazed outward into the unknown, seeming to long for an existence now so distant and unreachable, longing to be more--or less--than what he was. People visited him, studied him, spoke to him, and even wrote poetry about him. One day, someone decided Mr. Blinky required a change of scenery to improve his overall disposition. And thus began a great migratory effort to move Blinky to his new home on New Kansas, miles from his familiar abode on Saja, where he would reside for the rest of his life as Mr. Blinky.
Little is known about the circumstances surrounding his creation. The staff have admitted their own failure to correct the anomaly which created him. At one point, an attempt was made to simply vanquish him--eradicate him from existence in order to correct the flaw. The procedure was a rather simple one, but Mr. Blinky resisted. The Avman servers subsequently reported his nonexistence and yet there he was, blinking away, locked in a never-ending struggle for survival.
But that was not the only struggle Mr. Blinky has faced. His very nature invoked such curiosity in people, especially newcomers. Sadly, there have been those who did not respect Mr. Blinky and who have attempted to exploit him for their own benefit. But Mr. Blinky would not be taken advantage of. He would amuse himself with their antics for a time, but he would invariably grow weary of such trivialities and move on, ever reaching for his one true purpose in life.
Until one day, when that purpose was returned to him. The anomaly which created Mr. Blinky was finally found and corrected, and Mr. Blinky was returned to his former and original self. It is theorized that this correction was necessitated by upgrades to the client which allows us access to this world. Whatever the reason behind it, Mr. Blinky now resides back in Saja, DOID number 108891507. Justin and I found him among friends, similar DOID numbers which indicate a sequence of creation on this particular floating island. Simply fly Northeast from the main teleport point on Saja and land on the first island you glimpse. There he happily and peacefully watches over the Zoyoa Garden as its signpost, forever the garden's gatekeeper. Blinky has finally found that which he has sought all his life.
This is our friend, Mr. Blinky, DOID number 108891507. But he wasn't always so. Once upon a time, he had a purpose. He was created for a specific reason and he was content to fulfill that purpose. He lived out his life in Saja, surrounded by a tranquil atmosphere and soundtrack. But one day, something went terribly wrong. A horrible accident took place in Saja which thundered through the sky and shook every pod in its soil. And thus Blinky was unwillingly created, transformed into the white man we know and love. His first moments in this new existence must have been horrifying as he tumbled downward from his once comfortable location atop a floating island, spiraling toward the unknown land below. He shortly found himself standing on the shore of a completely foreign island, dense fog threatening him on one side, an ocean of blue concrete beckoning him on the other, and an ominous moon hanging above his head.
It wasn't long before others took notice of this newcomer, this strange gh0st in the machine. He received quite a bit of attention for one lone avatar. People wondered why he looked so sad and why he gazed outward into the unknown, seeming to long for an existence now so distant and unreachable, longing to be more--or less--than what he was. People visited him, studied him, spoke to him, and even wrote poetry about him. One day, someone decided Mr. Blinky required a change of scenery to improve his overall disposition. And thus began a great migratory effort to move Blinky to his new home on New Kansas, miles from his familiar abode on Saja, where he would reside for the rest of his life as Mr. Blinky.
Little is known about the circumstances surrounding his creation. The staff have admitted their own failure to correct the anomaly which created him. At one point, an attempt was made to simply vanquish him--eradicate him from existence in order to correct the flaw. The procedure was a rather simple one, but Mr. Blinky resisted. The Avman servers subsequently reported his nonexistence and yet there he was, blinking away, locked in a never-ending struggle for survival.
But that was not the only struggle Mr. Blinky has faced. His very nature invoked such curiosity in people, especially newcomers. Sadly, there have been those who did not respect Mr. Blinky and who have attempted to exploit him for their own benefit. But Mr. Blinky would not be taken advantage of. He would amuse himself with their antics for a time, but he would invariably grow weary of such trivialities and move on, ever reaching for his one true purpose in life.
Until one day, when that purpose was returned to him. The anomaly which created Mr. Blinky was finally found and corrected, and Mr. Blinky was returned to his former and original self. It is theorized that this correction was necessitated by upgrades to the client which allows us access to this world. Whatever the reason behind it, Mr. Blinky now resides back in Saja, DOID number 108891507. Justin and I found him among friends, similar DOID numbers which indicate a sequence of creation on this particular floating island. Simply fly Northeast from the main teleport point on Saja and land on the first island you glimpse. There he happily and peacefully watches over the Zoyoa Garden as its signpost, forever the garden's gatekeeper. Blinky has finally found that which he has sought all his life.
Rest in Peace, Mr. Blinky.
Jon Quixote was There!
Sunday, January 20, 2008
Hunt for There_Monitor 1/19/08
I had been dwelling on this clue all weekend. What could it mean? A bubble? I was as confused as a newborn baby. In an attempt to clear my head, I went for a short cruise. I hopped in my buggy and off I went, up to my bumper in our ocean's crystal clear water. I was following a shoreline south when, like a slice of lemon wrapped around a large gold brick, it hit me square in the face. Suddenly, everything made perfect sense! As all the clues fell into place, I popped the e-brake, spun that little buggy of mine around, and shot off to find There_Monitor!
As you can see, There_Monitor still wears that Adventure Quest t-shirt instead of the Big Eights shirt she has worn most of her life prior. I suppose change is inevitable. Nevertheless, she will always remain an icon of Big Eights for those of us who remember.
From the journal of There_Monitor....
Water, water, everywhere, and not a drop to drink. I was soooooooo thirsty. And I felt totally trapped on my small round island. Other islands were nearby but I could not manage the sea between myself and the next spot of land. I began to see the mirage of a cold drink in the distance, but I didn't need a mirage. I needed THE REAL THING! Miraculously a balloon landed by me. My rescuer laughed at my thirst. "You are so close to refreshment," he said. "I could see it clearly from the air. You are perched on a bubble!"
As you can see, There_Monitor still wears that Adventure Quest t-shirt instead of the Big Eights shirt she has worn most of her life prior. I suppose change is inevitable. Nevertheless, she will always remain an icon of Big Eights for those of us who remember.
Jon Quixote was There!
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